Observations By Kari Johnson: 2010

I was so excited to be flying home to see my family for Christmas. Little did I know that it would be a flight from hell. Whenever I book tickets for international flights I avoid flying Delta at all costs. I thought I was in the clear this time because it said it was an Air France flight. Well... apparently it was an Air France flight operated by the Dreaded DELTA. Here is a quick summary of my horrible flight home.

Beirut to Paris (MEA flight) - Left Saturday at 2am arrived in Paris at 5:55am. No problems, just tired. Oh, I guess I should mention that I had one of my lovely hours long coughing attacks. I'm sure the people around me were very pleased with that noise disturbance.

5 Hour layover in Paris - a little bored but manageable

Paris - Minneapolis - Get on board the 29 year old plane (yes, it really was that old, I asked the flight attendant). The overhead compartments are so small that I had to literally spend 5 minutes pushing and squeezing my appropriately sized carry-on into the bin. Finally, I sit down and realize my seat is very small AND I don't have my own TV at my seat. In fact, I can't even see the screens. At that point I quickly swallowed 2 tylenol pms to help me with the 9 hour flight. I managed to sleep on and off during the flight. The flight attendants only came around 2x during the long flight to offer us beverages (in 9 hours!). Finally, someone that can see the monitor, says that we are an hour ahead of schedule. Yipee! Then, the pilot announces the Minneapolis airport has been closed and we are being re-routed to Detroit, Michigan. WHAT?!?!

We land in Michigan with another redirected flight from Amsterdam. There we are, 500+ passengers trying to get on other flights. I stood in line with my luggage (2 large suitcases, 1 rolling carry-on, and my extra large purse) for not 1, not 2, not 3, but yes 3 hours and 45 minutes before it was my turn at the counter. Once I get to the counter I am told there are no flights tonight (duh!) and I can be on a flight tomorrow at noon. The surprise bonus from Delta - they gave me a hotel voucher! So at this point I am exhausted, grumpy, depressed, and at the same time delighted that I don't need to fork over money for a hotel room. I arrive at my hotel room 7 hours after I was supposed to have landed in Minneapolis. I instantly collapse into bed. Only to awaken every couple of hours due to jet lag.

Detroit - Minneapolis - I arrive at the airport at 9:30, my flight leaves at noon. Plenty of time, right?! When I arrive at the airport I am directed to check in at one of the kiosks. So I attempt that. I instantly find out that it won't let me and the other 300 people checking print out boarding passes from the kiosks. So I ask a Delta person what to do. They show me to a line. I get in line, wait 30 minutes, get to the front and the Delta rep. tells me that I am in the wrong line. She points me to another line (about 100 people long). I grudgingly go to that line. At this point I am not too dismayed. I know I am confirmed on the 12:00 flight, I just need to wait in line is all. I can do that, after all I have flown through the Nepal airport - I can handle waiting in lines!

The line does not move. Oh wait, it does move - only when people abandon the line and give up and flat out leave the airport. I wait 1, 2 hours. During that time I continually ask the circulating Delta reps what can I do, I just need to check in! The majority of the people around me were waiting to rebook flights not get on confirmed flights. Every time I asked the Delta rep told me to wait patiently, everyone needs to wait in the same line. Finally 45 minutes before my flight is set to leave I go up to another Delta rep and say my flight is leaving in 45 minutes can I please go to the front of the line. This is the response I get, "Maam, Delta does not prioritize passengers based on their flight times, you need to wait in line like everyone else." Then, 30 minutes before my flight takes off, I ask the 15 people still in front of me if I can budge in front of them since my flight is taking off. They said, and I quote, "Of course, Delta doesn't take prioritize their customers but the customers prioritize each other!" What great Christmas spirit. So, I get to the front of the line. And the Delta rep says, "Maam, I can't check you in, you are here too late." I explain to her I have been here since 9:30 and I am not the one that is too late (now, I might've used a few more explicits than that). She told me I could go to the end of the line if I wasn't going to be patient. I then explained to her I was patient last night when I left the airport after waiting around for 7 hours, I was patient during the first 2 hours of waiting in line this morning, but now I am not patient because I have tried to talk to every Delta rep saying I need to check in and no one bothered to help. She said, "Maam, this is the way the supervisor organized it this morning, we can't help random customers". Then the women walks away from the counter. I'm not sure what is going on, at this point I am glad I hadn't packed a gun in my suitcase or I might've gone postal. 20 minutes later the women comes back, chatting away on her personal cell phone. The Delta rep next to her says, "I'm going to take my break now, I'll be back in 30". I'm thinking to myself, "WHAT, you're taking a break when there are still over a 100 people in line and there are only 3 of you helping us! My delta rep then tells me she can get me on STANDBY on the 1:45 flight. I groan, and ask what happens if I can't get on the plane. She says I will be on standby then for the 3:00, 4:00, 5:00, and 7:00 flights. That does not sound promising!

The waiting game begins... Meanwhile, poor Sean has been waiting for me in Minneapolis for 24 hours now, I'm starting to feel guilty.

Waiting, waiting, waiting to hear my name be called. Finally, they call it and I can board the 1:45 plane! Woo hooo I am going to make it home! I find my seat, so relieved... Then the pilot says they need to deice. Okay, I am from Minnesota no big deal. So we go de-ice. Then the pilot announces that our engine has no power so they are going to taxi us back to the gate and try to get power. We sit for 35 minutes - the plane is boiling hot, a crying (actually she was screaming) baby is sitting in front of me. The pilot announces that they are going to try to jump start, or something like that, the plane. The guy next to me says, "Well, since the Minnesota NFL game was moved to Detroit since the dome collapsed we can at least get free tickets to the game if we don't get out tonight". That does not even sound tempting to me at this point. Another 20 minutes later and the pilot says the engine works now. Everyone gets excited. Then... "sorry, but we need to de ice again". GROAN... We taxi to where the de-icers are and another announcement, "the deicers have run out of whatever it is they spray". So we wait for about another 45 minutes later. Finally over 2 hours later we take off. I am actually typing this in the air as we speak. And yes, the baby in front of me is still screaming

So, I just thought I was done with the dramas of my trip but no there were still more issues. When we landed in Minneapolis we were told we would need to wait awhile because there was a plane at our gate. We waited about 10 minutes. Then we pull up to the gate and our plane gets stuck in a snowdrift, we need to wait another 10-15 minutes. Finally, at 5pm I get off the plane - 3.5 hours after we were originally supposed to get off. And 27 hours after I was originally supposed to arrive.